Monday, 30 April 2012


Well, its been a while i guess. Honestly, i don't know what to write and post on this here god-forsaken-blog. Currently having this thing called "Writer's Block", thump, thump, thump~ Writer's block is kinda the same situation when you're in an exam hall answering exam papers and your mind just goes blank. Well that's kinda what writer's block feels like, i think. Its when your mind just dunno what to puke out for your fingers to type and for others to admire, ecceyyy :P I am now just pushing random buttons on the keyboard. Like a chimpanzee in training for a mission to Mars (they push random buttons randomly, and people get excited for their version of dubstep) :P

Kennot la like this. Gotta come up with something to post, anything will do i guess. Haiz. So recently been to and fro between Facebook and Twitter, and it seems that love is in the air, and people are getting more and more lovey dovey. Well what do you expect, its spring kann, the season where creatures wanna get a room, ehem ehem and multiply. Miahahahaha. :P (browsing through the net simultaneously). Eh, found this interesting article, "Newton's Law of Love". hahahh. Sounds kinda stupid, but yeah whatever. 

* * * * *
Newton's Law of Love:-

Universal Law of Love
Love can never be created nor destroyed, it can only be transferred from one to another with some loss of money

First Law of Love:
A boy in love with a girl, continues to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, will continue to be in love with him. Until or unless any external agents (father or brother of the girl) comes into play and breaks the leg of the boy

Second Law of Love:
The rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same as to the increment or decrement of the boy's bank balance

Third Law of Love:
The force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while slapping 

* * * * *

So i guess that's why my love life sucked kowt. Because even love is related to science, (physics to be exact) hahahh. Since i'm really not so bright at physics, and Miss Adlina confirmed that when i failed her paper during the high school mid term exams. hahahh :P So it figures that i'm just plain dumb when it comes to these lovey dovey things. hahahh. But yeah i have to admit, some of the things i think about other than rage that made my mind blank, is love. Its just so sweet ya' know? hahahh. Ok i should stop yapping utter nonsense now. :D

* * * * *

p/s: i like hugs, it makes me feel safe and loved. #random. hahahh kbye~

Monday, 23 April 2012


Turn on the news today what do we see, surface crisis, war, poverty, pollution, the usual. Believe it or not these are just mere distractions, as always. Distractions of the real dangers hidden in our daily live, shaded by ignorance of the of the masses. Think about it, life is a battle for meaning, the enemy is meaningless. Our existence is to make a difference in life. We're here to make ripples in history. But what means are we tryna fight for? What difference will we make? What kind of history will we be leaving behind?

We're kids, we're not held by the rules that binds the adults. Even as to that regard, adults are kinda more fucked up than kids are. Tell a kid not to do something, they abide. But forbid a grown up from doing something, the urged to do it even more. With even just one single generation of adults with this nature to "go against", then we could simply say goodbye forever to a future of serenity and peace. They might complain about the corruption of youths these days, but they forgot who raised them initially, adults lead by examples, the corruption must come from somewhere.

A dark tunnel, as dark as our hidden fears, the stench from the poisonous gasses, rats, darkness, danger, there's really nothing scary about those. The really scary stuffs are nearer. Closer to home. Echoes of someones's screaming. Screams, yells, shouts, the way parents solve their problems. Even that, that's not really a solution for their problems. Have you ever wondered why, parents never finish their problems? Because they don't want them to be done with. What's left for them when the problem is solved? See, after a problem is solved, the only thing left for them is the unknown, that is what really scares them. People always think that we have to be strong, fearless. they always think that we need to be prepared for the unknown. Wrong.  Truth is, we should embrace the unknown, before the unknown embraces us.

At school, i hated the part where we have to write essays on " the cause and how to educated people bout hiv/aids", or "what cause baby dumping and how to curb it", or "what would you do to improve the environment" and some other shits like that. Instead of writing what i really felt was necessary, i just wrote again and again, campaigns, educate the public, safe sex and whatnot. Reality is, those stupid things would've never work in real life. Because if it did work, then i wouldn't have to write stupid essays bout those kinda problems. What i really wanted to write was, growing up is a disease, transforming us into ignorant and greedy bastards. Taking and having pleasure their own way, without thinking of the consequences of their own action. Example, the first world war happened partly because people thirst for attention, unnecessary stupid and childish attention.

We're living in an era where everything is disposable. paper cups, paper plates, plastic bottles, portable toilets, and many other shits. Now everything is disposable. And with the now 7 billion and growing population, we could relentlessly say that in the near future, even people could be entirely disposable. We already see people throwing away their babies, and old people away. So the era of disposable people is kinda inevitable.

Problems acknowledge, but solving them, its like looking into a paradox. There's really no clear mark of black and white, try to solve one, another pops up.

Friday, 20 April 2012


This here post might have the potential to cause some sentiments (piss people off or make people cry) (or maybe not at all) (#JustSaying). For our respected i'm-not-sure-if-you-exist-readers' emotional safety we (by 'we' i mean 'i') recommend you not to go on reading any further if you're gonna be pissed off and marah me later on. Read at own risk. But if you read this and you felt nothing, and nothing happened, ignore everything here and go make out with a unicorn :) Other than that happy choking lovelies.

Neverland. You guys know that place? Obviously you guys would know where it is kan? Well to those who don't know where Neverland is, here's a brush up on your geography. Its near the land of Peopledontgiveafcuk, in between Shitgoanddie Island and Dieseeificare Island. So yeah that's where it is. Got it? Good. Well as you guys know, Peter Pan, the boy who never grows old lives there with his band of lost boys. They have all kinds of fun there, pick on pirates, main masak-masak with the red indians, never taking any baths, and they smoke weed, ice or pot, or whatever drug they have there, getting high talking to fairies, swimming with mermaids and flying without wings and all. All in all their life is perfect. :)

Why the sudden interest in Neverland? Well simply because, figuratively speaking anything (not just about anything though) would be better than being cooped up here, living on hostile ground, Neverland seems to be the best place in mind. I don't know how to put it into words but, put it this way, its like i'm on a mine field, one false move and BOOM ! i'm dead. Sigh, its hard living like this, not to mention, dull, boring and dead. I don't know why but i don't feel like putting up with "happy" or "smiles" here and now. Because even if there is a little ray of happiness peeking through the wide open window, call me blind, but i don't see it lasting. Depressing. I know. Try walking, jumping, and running in my shoes. (= ="). I haven't tried everything yet, but Neverland to me seems to be the most promising way out, coz i really like the part about not being subjected to aging there, so there's no need for me to buy all those awet muda pills that they're desperately trying to sell on tv. Only problem now is to find someone who would wanna travel and live there forever and ever with me. Not that its any real problem for me though, who wouldn't like me kan? :D

Sigh. Sorry for the all the BS-ing earlier on. This little retard is currently flying into a cloud of bad emotions. Not good for the health, i know, i'll swallow a bottle of random pills later. Gosh, only god knows how i feel right here and now. It wasn't this hard earlier because i have Kuantan to distract me a bit, but even then each smile i had hides something, stopping me from really enjoying things to its fullest extents. Now that Kuantan is a mere memory, coping with it is even harder. Sometimes i do feel like crying my head off, but macho guys don't cry. Crying is for sissies kan? hehehh. People might say that by keeping it to yourself and by not telling anyone, it only makes it harder for you. But telling it to another is kinda hard and not really an option for me, coz you know in the end, the one who has to deal with such things, who has to face the music (music don't have faces, yeah noted, deal with it), the one who has to take the bull by the horns is little ol me. Therefor i see no reason for me to burden another with my own stupid problem. I know people out there have bigger issues than me, you know like, cirit-birit trying to find a loo, where to find money to buy drugs, which lorong has the best hookers, serious things like that compared to mine is like alahh dust i think. XP

Huhh. Well to add to that, i feel like E.T. abandoned by his little freaky cone headed alien friends. Alone. (o.O) So yeah. I have those problems paired with this other thing to. My life is great! (= ="). Not really saying that i don't have good friends though. I do pride myself having lots of good friends. Thing is, they're all just to far away and occupied. Dang it. As if we're separated by continents. Sheeesh. Everytime i feel like talking privately to a friend, you know like pillow talks and hush-hush behind closed doors sorta things, i always get held back. 1) i see they're not really interested, 2) awkward circumstances, and 3) they doze off. See what i have to deal with now? Sheessh This time i feel like Pluto. Not even a star and disregarded as a planet. Shit its cold. (= ="). Yeah sometimes i do feel stupidly jealous of those people who has those hush-hush relationship with their good friends know like sisters or bromance kinda thing? hahahah. But yeah even a macho lil boy like me do have that sensitive side that he cant act upon. :P

I think i've been missing my point here, my mission was to be furiously angry. like ANGRY ! and fry you i'm-not-sure-if-you-exist-readers' brains, fried i tell you! like scrambled eggs! :P. Corrupting you forever. But i know you i'm-not-sure-if-you-exist-readers brains are already corrupted, no thanks to me. So yeah, irrelevant and i'm just BS-ing now. Well i just realized something, i've ran out of anger to write about for now. Man, this blogging thing is really a good therapy for maintaining stress! Wow! Definitely gonna recommend blogging to those angry and desperate housewives of Wisteria Lane. I bet Bree Van De Kamp, Gabrielle Solis, Lynette Scavo, Susan Mayer, and Mary Alice Young's blog would be really juicy and scandalous. purrrr miow~ X3

So, nothing else to write really. With that bravo and brava for me. Anger contained, body kept healthy, and precious things saved (coz i have this one friend who likes to toss their iron around in anger, you know the thing you iron your clothes with. But thats another unrelated story). Well then. Kbye~

p/s: gosh blogging really is good for the health! i feel no pain in my chest now! XD
p/p/s: sorry this post is full of only words, nk load pics lembab thp gaban xlarat. so, xoxo :P

Wednesday, 18 April 2012



Yeah, that is what i literally screamed out loud upon finding out that i was offered a spot in UiTM Foundation in Law (I hated it because my aim was initially diploma in biotechnology). I screamed so loud that the next door neighbor (also my aunt) came rushing to see if i stabbed myself trying to cut bawang. (- -"). But nobody shared my grief. Mom was ecstatic, calling dad soon after that saying that their son is gonna be a "lawyer". hahahh. The only thing i have in mind that time was, " how can this little loser be a lawyer? wimp couldn't even talk publicly ?! " haiz. I almost died there and then. But that was almost a year ago. Cutting the crap now. I've finished my foundation program, and currently unemployed waiting for the results to be released next week. The suspense is killing us Law students alike, (coz apparently there are rumors going around that many failed 087). Dang it we don't wanna repeat. Malu wooo. o.O''

Cutting the crap, again (idk why and how la people wanna cut "crap" aka shit, poop, feces. I can only imagine people cutting crap with their butts). LOLs. Well the only thing i wanna share now is on "WHY YOU SHOULD JOIN DEBATE". I've only enjoyed the pleasures of this club in my final semester, which is kinda late. So i wanna take the chance to inform the future "hadek-hadek" of UiTM Kuantan about the perks of being a debat-er and debater of UiTM Kuantan, so they won't miss the chance of being a part of something awesome. :). I know, i know, upon reading this some of you hadek-hadek will think "homaigodd, this abang is sooooo cool, nice and handsome, nk jd hadek angkat boleh?" the answer is "boleh!!" hahahahh. (bpk la perasan gile laki ny) XD. Hahahh, i'm not being "perasan" as you might say, i'm just being confident of myself (a value which everyone should have in them) :).

Moving on, here are some reasons "WHY YOU SHOULD JOIN DEBATE". :)

LE COOL PEOPLE. Believe me hadek-hadek, the people in this club are literally some of the coolest ever lived! In my generation (ecceyy cm da lama sgt je :P), the members of the club consist of cheerleaders, head boys and head girls, singers, artists, guitarist, pianist, athletes, all-rounders, high-achievers, brainiacs, tough guys, casanovas, prom queens, beauty queens, you name it the coolest people are all part of the club. Non-members everywhere envied us debat and debaters, and that's a fact agreed upon by debaters everywhere. Our presence being purely of fun is what makes people envy us. No, we're not cocky, or rude, or too hidung tinggi. We're just outspoken, frank, and full spirited thats all. :)

LE PLACES WE GO. Being a debater its our nature to habiskan the HEA and HEP's funds. hahahh. Coz debaters make it a crucial point for them to go to as many competition they can, not necessarily to win, but for the experience to be gain. :). Plus its also a good excuse to go on holliday with close friends. Often its not about the destination, but more to the fun time we shared in the journey together. Greater still the trip and expenses are all funded by UiTM! And that is why UiTM dihatiku. XD

LE NEW FRIENDS WE MAKE. Another good thing about being a debater is that you get to meet people from everywhere, fight them (with word, not fists), and at the end of the day be good friends with them. Now isn't that just awesome? Personally i've made some friends from all over too. Its not just that, you could also get lucky in the love department, as you know, debat and debaters are all artistic and romantically expressive. So they say la, who knows, you might get lucky and catch a guppy or two? hahahahh XD 

Well, i wanna pour my heart and soul into this post, garnishing it with sugar spice and everything nice, about the awesome fun i had, so that all you i'm-not-sure-if-you-exist-readers could easily digest these shit. :P. But those kinds of memories are impossible to put into words, especially by a little retard like me with my ever so limited vocabulary. All in all, i could say my life so far even with all the stupid mistakes i've made, is awesome. Just AWESOME.

Le tribute to Jay, our awesomest Captain Awesome. She acts as a friend, sister, coach, and advisor teaching all that she knows to us, her senseless little anak-anak buah. Personally taking me under her wing of 80% awesomeness and 20% kooky pervetness is a privilage any retard would ever dream to have the chance. There would be no Debate Club without our Captain Awesome. Thanks Kak Long Jay.

Le UiTM Kuantan 1. Awesome teammates, Hanan and Alliya. Thanks for putting up with this useless dummy, and sorry for always slacking off. You guys are awesome, yes you guys put on a soft, sweet image, but you guys kick butts! Thank You for making this whole journey unforgettable ! :D

Le UiTM Kuantan 2. Best Friend Najwa, Melodious former teammate Iman, and Sarah Sweet Heart. XD. You guys kick and hand the opponents butts back to them ! Individually you're great, but as a team you guys are awesome ! Go Girl Power ! idk why but i see Butterrcup, Blossom, and Bubbles in the lower right picture. Kawaii !! :D

Le UiTM Kuantan 3.Lil sis Farah aka Fairy, Big Bro Iman, and Persuasive Syauqi. Awesome again is the word. Though you say you're new to debating, you guys owned it ! :D

Le new psycho twin in blue. In the past debate competitions i've been to, i've always been the only guy in the whole team. But with my long lost twin who doesn't at all look like me i don't feel odd alone. hahahahh. Fish, nothing much to say but, its nice to have met and known you ! If i may comment, i'd say that you freak me out sometimes, funny at other times, and a whole lot of drama most of the time. Hahahahh. But i know deep down you'd be a fun friend to keep. Stay awesome ! :D 

Le crazy best friend Najwa, though your hair, looks, dressing, and presence gives people the idea that you're a lesbo, i know and belive that you are and forever will be an exceptional girl with an awesome softer side. Tough and strong as you are, you're still a girl deserving of a guy's love. Dont worry your prince charming is on his way, its just that his gps broke, he got lost on the way and is too stubborn to ask for direction. Patience, he'll arrive soon. :D

Sweet Hearts Sarah and Bella. Though we've only been friends for a while, but we've managed to be good friends. Thanks for being my body guards, my ushers, my hunnies, my mummy ayams. hahahahh. I'll really do miss both of you guys, your laughter, and smile :D. We'll meet again at the MDS right? :D

*dikelilingi gadis-gadis* But yes i'm single, and still working to be the perfect boyfriend for that special one. I know it gets lonely sometimes being single. hahahahahah. XD. But you girls, kept me company most of the time, till i don't really feel like i'm single at all, you girls are my scandals. XD. For that thanks ! 

Yes i was an insecure child depending on others. A little retard who fought for nothing but his benefits. A little idiot knowing nothing about how to live life. But i know now that even by only a fraction of the width of my not so straight hair, i've grown for the better, accepted myself as who i am, open up to the world, made friends to some stangers, started living life. No the debate club didn't really do that, but its an actual start, at least it is for me. And that is how, the debate club changed me. And yes i am cam whoring. If you have a problem with me taking too many pictures, then its your problem coz i dont give a dang. :P

p/s: i did wanna upload more pictures but the wifi at home moves like a turtle on weed. haiz. But yeah, to those  i'm-not-sure-if-you-exist-readers, thanks for visiting :)

Sunday, 1 April 2012


I'm watching you dude

Well, after a week of spending the times alone in UiTM Kuantan, Padang Lalang campus, (not really alone though, there was Iman boboy, J, Hannan, Anis, Iman gegirl, Bada & Ors) I'm finally back home. Jay Bee baby ! Muahahahahahh ! Ok that was a bit over. XP. But not a moment too soon after i set foot in the house something happened, something bad, real bad (but hey, what else is new. (- -")), right there and then i regretted being happy about being back home all together. I was like " Dafuq ? can't you you people see i'm trying to bask in the happiness of being home here ? Where's your spirit of treating me like a prince people ? " Pffftttt ! my day was made there and then. (- -''). Aiyo, cannot live la like this. (T T)

Yeah, as good as life goes, it still has a way of kicking you dead in the ass when you least expect it. When that  happens, believe me my I'm-not-sure-if-you-exist-friends it hurts as hell ! Haiz. Its really true what they say though, karma's a bi**h. Even if it happens to someone else, you still get affected too you know ? Its like the principle of suicide bombing, yeah the dummy who bombed himself is the one dead, but if you stand too close, aiyo I tell you, you're gonna get one hell of a 'boo boo'. Then only you're gonna go all " What The Fish did I do too even deserve all this ?! ". But its really no use, hell has no fury, something, something. (- -''). How am I gonna survive till September la like this ?!. Shit. (= ='')

Some other thing I like to add as advice to the non-existing readers of this blog, firstly REFLECT ON YOURSELF BEFORE COMMENTING ON OTHERS ! got that ? So you do this good to that guy, or give those benefits to some other dudes dressed in cardboard boxes, or ate 10 whole chicken pie in the name of charity, well god damned you still don't have the rights to comment others on matters you know almost nothing about, belittle-ling them thinking you're right. If you don't know the 'behind the scenes' of the dude's or dudette's lives as to what drives them to do so, than just STFU ! I'm just saying. Less people will get hurt emotionally, mentally and physically. '( \  / )'

Secondly, if you're a guy, then GROW A PAIR AND BE A MAN ! Shit, I don't really know what's really going on in that thick head of yours, but when your lady is mocked, you tell the guy to take back what he said or beat the breakfast, lunch and dinner out of the guy (which ever works). Now I'm still a boy, single at that, but even I know what a man is to a woman, a protector, not a freaking slave driver ! Dude here's 50cents, go and buy yourself some common sense please, if the even have any on sale. (- -'')

Lastly (for now) THINK BEFORE YOU ACT OR SAY ANYTHING ! Just wanna set this straight, yes with threat and torment, people succumb due to fear. But dude do you know that the one force stronger than fear is HOPE ? People give up in fear, they give up trying anything with the realization that they can never make it, but with hope people do everything imaginable to keep on longing, fighting, striving, waiting for good things to come sooner or later. This longing and waiting of hope is what makes people suffer greater pain. Yes you could kill people with fear, but with hope people die slowly suffering agonizing even more. 

So that is my three pieces of advice, reflect on yourself before commenting on others, grow a pair and be a man, and think before acting or saying anything. I need you to remember those three and if not, SOMEBODY'S GONNA GET HURT REAL BAD.

p/s: Angry blogger is angry ..( \  / )..